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28 Sep


There’s the good old reliable way to do things….and then there’s me. I’ve decided to let you follow me as I try to land the perfect job.

I’ll be documenting the entire process for you as we go. More importantly, you can invite me to come to work with you!

But before we go there, let’s cover a few important details. Yes details. People insist on having them, so I’ve learned to conform. 

First, my name is Breanne Zapien. I live in Kansas City, Missouri.

What kind of job am I looking for? That’s what we’e here to find out. The Kansas City job market is on the rise and in our tech-based economy, I’ve been inspired to keep learning and

I’m ready for a new challenge.

Sure, I can pull up job search sites, but I want to hear from you. Why not collaborate and network with people that might know about an opportunity that I don’t. If I’m going to dedicate my time and skills to a company, I want to get it right. I’m interviewing them as much as they’re interviewing me.

hey girl

…Oh, did I mention, I think I’m funny?

We cover many hot topics

  • including how you can TAKE ME TO WORK WITH YOU! I’ll be doing some job shadowing projects and documenting it all. We’ll look at what jobs are out there, how to track them down, and when to walk away.
  • Top 5 things I’m doing to keep my skills relevant
  • What’s new in the world of resumes
  • My background and work history
  • What will I wear to my interviews? #OOTD This is what people really want to know isn’t it? 


I hope you’ll follow along.

You can find me on Instagram @takebreannetowork

and on Facebook

As always,

Breanne Zapien





17 Sep

I read an article the other day that employers and future employers are scouring social media, now more than ever, when considering potential candidates. I decided to cut to the chase and do the footwork myself.  I mean, really, how bad could it be?


First stop: GOOGLE

I shoved my name into the search bar and….loading

Google Img Search for Breanne HiNoon for future employer

So there are few red flags. Let’s try to determine what a potential employer might notice, shall we?



Ok, so Google might not be the best place to start. Let’s try somewhere else. I think I’m a smashing success on Pinterest. Let’s check out some of my pins.



Analyzing Pinterst


Potential Employer Checks Social Media


Well, Pinterest wasn’t much better. Maybe my future employer will jump straight to Facebook. Surely that will be better.

Facebook fan page like page


Well this just got very weird. I don’t see alcohol, but I can’t be certain that it wasn’t involved. You can’t get into any trouble on Twitter though. I’m almost certain.

Twitter Work Related


Oh looky there! A work related tweet, right at the top of the page. See Twitter is fine!!!

…Son of a….Ok, that Men’s Humor tweet isn’t going to make me look bad is it?

One more site, before I drop like a hot potato, out of this rat race, people call jobs.

Urban Dictionary "Breanne"


Alright! Score. Not bad at all really.  Let’s look up my full name.

Urban Dictionary Breanne HiNoon


That’s ridiculous. I mean, Urban Dictionary isn’t even really a thing. What happens when the roles are reversed?

Potential Employer Urban Dictionary


I think I have some potential after all. #tellyourfriends




If you found this blog helpful, please pass it along and share with your friends. I’d love to meet them too!



8 Sep

…It was bound to happen sooner or later. I was leaning more towards later, but I can’t be too upset with how it turned out. My seven year old, taking the first step in her new relationship. Now, some may be surprised that it was encouraged. In fact I paid her to do it.

Luckily, I think things are going to be moving slowly….



Wanna See?



*No money was exchanged in the making of this transaction* Tell your friends.






My Very First Blog Post (circa 2005!)

3 Sep

I flipped through my rolodex this morning to the very back of the internet and there it was – my very first blog post.

That’s right, I managed to sign in without one failed attempt to Xanga! Before there was WordPress or Blogger or Tumblr or what have you, there was Xanga.

When I tracked down my old page, I found it no longer exists in original form. Xanga had moved along and I didn’t go with it. So in a pretty little zip file, I accessed this pretty embarrassing glimpse into my former life.

Former life may be a little generous, because much to my chagrin, I haven’t changed quite enough. So let me set the scene.

My screen name: Pinklexxxus52

My avitar: Me with baby Sam (in our pickup truck) What is happening? (*and yet more proof that I invented the selfiesam and i

HOLD the phone. What’s up with this name? Three x’s. Was I unawares? I just want to gently pat the top of my 24 year old head. Speaking of which, here is my photo


I wonder what I was whispering about?

PREMISE: So here’s what my Xanga was. I called myself RodeoMom (I’ve never once attended a rodeo). It was essentially an advice column to teenage girls. I friended all my little sisters’ friends (no one my age was on the internet and they were defiantly not blogging!).

So here you go. My first ever blog post!

Happy 2005. Just want to let you know that I am ready for business. Let me know if you need anything. ANYTHING. Well as far as me answering questions……I do not perform services. Unless as you know I do perform some life managing services, which include

Personalized Signitures*

The Ten Things To Think about before Tinkering with Teenage boys!!!

How to get your room cleaned. FOR REAL

Organization 101


Tricks of the Trade

Ask Away

*please note that the personalized signature comes with a lifetime guarantee of individuality accompanied by  a one time processing fee.

Well there you have it. Not much has changed. I still blog, I still offer Top 10’s (did I invent that too? I think I must have),  I still love teenagers and want to help them achieve awesome, I’m still a very strange mom offering services that don’t exist. If nothing else, at least I’m consistent. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go cowboy up…






I QUIT: 20 Instances at Least

1 Sep

In childhood I quit

Softball (because I had to pee)

Believing in Santa Clause (because my dad always told me the truth)

Wetting the bed (because I was 12)

Being an only child (because having sisters is more fun)

Getting spankings (because I laughed the last time)


Stop believing in Santa



In adolescence I quit

Waiting for my first kiss (because I met the boy of my dreams. I was wrong.)

Getting up early (because I realized how much I loved sleeping)

Believing that my dad always told me the truth (because I learned he was human)

Following all the rules (because I got more attention when I didn’t)

Being a child (because I never felt like one anyway)

Teenager in the 90's


In my 20’s I quit

My job (because I wanted to stay home with my kids)

Being afraid to let God love me (because He showed me His grace)

Smoking (because I was a mother)

Spending money (because I never had any)

Expecting people to get my jokes (because I was laughing and that was enough)












 In my 30’s I quit

Looking for the next best thing (because I had it all)

Wearing boot cut jeans (because it was just time)

Fearing I couldn’t sing (because I like to)

Holding out for calories to not make you chubby (because I decided to just workout)

Trying to be the perfect mom (because I realized my kids think I’m pretty good anyway)



Don’t give up, keep going, don’t slack, make shit happen, try harder, you’re not trying hard enough, don’t give in, no pain no gain, be persistent, keep marching, get back up, tomorrow’s a new day, winners never quit and quitters never win, prevail, fight, GO!


People are always telling me not to quit

(but I don’t always do what I’m told).



Breanne hinoonblog



Baby’s First Tastes of Food (Funniest Reactions!)

19 Jun

This video was so much fun to put together. It took several months of getting footage and it all happens in less than three minutes! We recorded Betsy every time she tried a bite of a new food and her facial expressions were hysterical.

Betsy is our third child. We are older now and seasoned parents. That is by no means to say we know what we are doing; we are just parenting differently at this stage in the game.

Feeding time (she sounds like a chicken) is less of a struggle for baby #3. I remember with Sam, we strictly followed the baby food jar labels, as if Gerber were the be-all and end-all for our child. We religiously made sure he had his grains, veg, and fruit serving at every meal and minced up his little portion just so. If he missed a meal or wasn’t eating much we fretted whether or not he would “be ok”!

By the time we had our second child we were a little more realistic. They will eat when they are hungry and they won’t when they aren’t! She got her nutrients and we have always been conscious of what we are feeding our kids. No trans fats and processed food here!

Now with Betsy. She eats what we eat. She’s not very impressed by baby food purees and I think that has a lot to do with the fact that from the beginning of her food exploration we just gave her…….FOOD! There is a pretty popular trend right now called Baby Led Weaning. It’s where you give your baby food and let them gnaw and explore it. In the early stages they might not even be eating much of it (trust me, most of it ends up on the floor). Opponents of baby led weaning fear that the baby “might choke” or they won’t be able to chew because they don’t have teeth. Trust me, your baby will find a way.

We really didn’t even know that baby led weaning was a thing. We just fed our baby. I guess we do a mixture of techniques without even thinking about it. Go with your gut. That’s our mantra. Our baby is hungry, she eats food. Tell your friends.

I love that we have this footage. Watching it even now makes me teary. She ages four months in three minutes during this video. That’s what life feels like. They grow too fast.

Thanks a Lot Pinterest!

24 May

Sometimes, in the back of my head, I think that half the stuff on Pinterest someone put there just to see if people would really do it!

I mean where else do accept gourmet meals be placed next to rock hard abs. Pin now, eat later, skinny never!

Now, I have dubbed myself a “Pinterest Tryer-outer” It’s very scientific. I don’t want my pins to get all sad and dusty sitting on my boards, so I’ll try em’ out, then re-pin them to my “Attempts” board and review them.

Exhibit A:

Here you will find things, I actually tried on Pinterest and I tell you the TRUTH about them!

Here you will find things, I actually tried on Pinterest and I tell you the TRUTH about them!

And….here’s what I did today!

Contouring Make Up Pin

Don’t mess with me Pinterest Pinners!

Love forever,

How to Hide a Double Chin

8 May

When Facebook first came out it was geared toward college kids and that’s when I signed up. It was the winter of 2006 and I was pregnant with my second child. Way back when we didn’t even know what “social media” was.

Why does this matter? Well because from that point on any picture that would be taken of me inevitably would end up on the social media site and my fluctuating weight would forever be encapsulated on the inter-webs.

In 2009, I came up with the idea: How to Avoid a Double Chin to make my “friends” laugh. Today, three and a half years later, social media has become my platform where I can post crazy things like this:

Here are some examples from the 2006 album that didn’t make it into the video. Enjoy:

Highlighting your lips will distract your audience away from your double chin

Highlighting your lips will distract your audience away from your double chin

Use someone else's body to hold your baby and then tag yourself in the picture!

Use someone else’s body to hold your baby and then tag yourself in the picture!

Disclaimer* Sorry, but I started the little hands bit Kristen Wiig! One day we will argue it. This photo was taken in late 2008 and Kristen didn't do little hands until 2009! Give me my money!

Disclaimer* Sorry, but I started the little hands bit Kristen Wiig! One day we will argue it. This photo was taken in late 2008 and Kristen didn’t do little hands until 2009! Give me my money!



3 May

Finding time to hang out with my husband isn’t the easiest with three kids and our busy lives, but lately we’ve been carving out time for “date night” and we video tape it. ….SCREECH!…what?!

Our family is used to having cameras around, vlogging for our Youtube channel: Breanneshop52. It’s a fun place where we show funny clips throughout our days in hopes of making people laugh and realize that you can find the funny in most situations.

Eric and I decided we wanted a channel just for us, where we talk about whatever comes to mind. Let me tell you, that’s the truth. I have no idea what he’s going to say next! After 4 episodes we’re having a great time and hopefully making people laugh along with us.

Here is last night’s video. We’d love to hear your feedback.

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